Lentil Soup

It's been a while since I've posted any recipes but I must tell you, I have had some of the BEST, healthy food  in the last few months! I can thank Pinterest, The Food Network Magazine, and Cooking Light Magazine for majority of the recipes that I have tried recently.

Near the end of the summer, I made a deal with my parent's that I would come over in the afternoon and cook the meals, if Abigail and I could eat with them. I hated cooking for just two people and it was lonely eating by ourselves all the time when my parent's were just down the road. It has worked out beautifully. I must admit though that in the last few weeks, I haven't done as much of the work as I had been doing because my mom and I have been doing the C25K in the afternoons so it's been more of a group effort.

One of the things that we began to incorporate into our meal plans was Meatless Monday's. Every Monday we go the entire day without eating meat which means that we have to get our protein from other sources like quinoa or beans. Going meatless once a week is not only good for our health but our wallets as well! :) Some weeks it's a challenge to come up with new meatless recipes and we are always on the lookout for new things to try but we've quickly discovered some meals that are our favorites and we've tried a couple of things that we won't be eating again...like the supposed "Best Mushroom Soup You'll Ever Eat in Your Life" (gag) or the "Broccoli and White Bean Soup" that was supposed to a healthy twist on Broccoli and Cheese soup (disgusting). One of the things that constantly comes up in rotation is Giada De Laurentiis' Lentil Soup.

I had only ever tried lentil's a few times and I had only cooked them like you would regular beans and ate them over rice or quinoa but my parent's had a bag of lentils in their pantry and wanted a different way to cook them so I took to the Internet and searched out recipes. One of the first one's I came across was Giada's and I'm a huge fan of hers and the recipe was simple and didn't require a ton of ingredients. So on a Meatless Monday I made Giada's Lentil Soup. It was so good! It only needed a bit of spice, so I turned to my trusty bottle of Texas Pete Hot Sauce and a couple of dashes did the trick. We didn't waste any of that soup!

A few weeks later I took it to church for one of our Senior Sunday meals. My dad's church feeds the senior adult members every first Sunday of the month. It's usually a soup, salad, and sandwich deal and since my dad has been teaching a health and nutrition class on Sunday nights we try and make the meal as healthy as possible. So I took the lentil soup but this time with an addition of a can of mild Rotel tomatoes. I knew the senior adults might not like it too spicy but the soup really did need a kick. The mild tomatoes gave it just the punch it needed without being too spicy. It was a hit! After everyone took leftovers home, there wasn't any left for me to bring home! :)

So as the weather is about to cool down and the first part of next week is supposed to be pretty chilly I would suggest making this hearty but meatless meal! It will be easy on your wallet and your waistline!

Enjoy!

Lentil Soup – Giada De Laurentiis

Ingredients

·         2 tablespoons olive oil, plus extra for drizzling

·         1 medium onion, chopped

·         2 carrots, peeled and chopped

·         2 celery stalks, chopped

·         2 garlic cloves, chopped

·         Salt and freshly ground black pepper

·         1 (14 1/2-ounce) can diced tomatoes

·         1 pound lentils (approximately 1 1/4 cups)

·         11 cups low-salt chicken broth

·         4 to 6 fresh thyme sprigs

·         2/3 cup dried elbow pasta

·         1 cup shredded Parmesan

Directions

Heat the oil in a heavy large pot over medium heat. Add the onion, carrots, and celery. Add the garlic, salt, and pepper and sauté until all the vegetables are tender, about 5 to 8 minutes. Add the tomatoes with their juices. Simmer until the juices evaporate a little and the tomatoes break down, stirring occasionally, about 8 minutes. Add the lentils and mix to coat. Add the broth and stir. Add the thyme sprigs. Bring to a boil over high heat. Cover and simmer over low heat until the lentils are almost tender, about 30 minutes.

Stir in the pasta. Simmer until the pasta is tender but still firm to the bite, about 8 minutes. Season with salt and pepper, to taste.

Ladle the soup into bowls. Sprinkle with the Parmesan, drizzle with olive oil, and serve.

*For additional spice and taste, you may add a can of Rotel tomatoes to the above recipe.

*I use a bit of dried thyme instead of fresh sprigs.

*I use a whole cup of dried whole wheat elbow pasta

*I omit the extra drizzle of olive oil. It really doesn't need it. 

Choose Your Hard

My life has been utterly crazy this year. A lot of changes occurred that I honestly didn't expect to happen as last year drew to a close.

I was telling a friend the other day how last year during the holidays I was able to stay completely focused and on track with my healthy lifestyle but sometime after the first of the year, everything came to a stand still. Most people struggle during the holidays to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I mean, we are overwhelmed with parties and family gatherings, and the central theme is usually food. This food is often high fat, high calorie, and highly processed! But I stayed strong, I ate as healthy as I could and only tasted dessert if it was something I just couldn't pass up. I actually managed to lose weight in November and December last year.

About mid-January I ran smack into a brick wall and it didn't budge. I made several feeble attempts at tearing down the wall or at least climbing over it in the coming months but in the end I had nothing to show for it. I actually gained some weight back. Thankfully it was less than 10 pounds but still, that it so disheartening after so much progress. What happened?

Well...life happened! My husband enlisted into the U.S. Army, he quit his job, we moved to Florida only about three weeks before he had to report for BCT, I said goodbye to him, missed him more than words can say, learned how to solo-parent while he's away, began watching my niece on a daily basis, started home-schooling both my daughter and my niece, took my first airplane flight to see my husband graduate BCT, said goodbye again, had to deal with the heartache and loneliness again, dealt with issues with my rental house and my husband's vehicle, etc, etc, etc.... I really could go on but you get the idea. Life has been a little on the hard side this year and I let some of these things control me instead of taking charge of the situation. I ate poorly, rarely exercised, and barely slept! Again, I made some attempts to get back on track but none of them lasted very long. Truth is, although I wanted to lose more weight, my heart wasn't in it and eating the food made me feel good (until I was finished and regretted it).

Sometimes, it takes an eye-opening situation to get you over the brick wall. And I had one. It happened after I saw my husband again for the first time in over 2 months at his BCT graduation. I had told him before he left that while he was away, working so hard, that I would be doing the same thing at home. I had for a bit. I did about a month of P90X and then gave up when I didn't see the results that I had expected. There he was looking so handsome and skinny and I felt awful and disgusting. Honestly, I did. I feel yucky when I've been eating junk for too long and I really felt gross. I know my husband loves me no matter what size I am but I wanted to look as good for him as he looked and I knew I didn't. It still took me a bit after I came home to get back on track because I was still letting my emotions control me. I was tired, lonely, and depressed. Seeing him for only 2 days was awesome but torturous at the same time!

I finally realized that if I want to feel better about myself the next time I see him, I have to get my act together. Now, my healthy lifestyle is all about me...my health, how I feel, etc but there is nothing wrong with wanting to improve yourself for your spouses sake if you are doing it in a healthy way. So I decided to do what worked for me before...The Couch to 5K. I also decided to give up sweets and processed sugar until my daughter's birthday party in  November. It was 55 days until her party on the day I decided to do it. I started C25K the same week. I am now 6 weeks into my C25K training (I still have 2 days left to do of week 6) and I only have 16 days left of no sweets! And I have made progress! Major progress...to me anyway. I hit one of my big weight loss goals a week or so ago. I'm super proud of myself for sticking with it. I have about 4 more pounds to lose to hit one of my major goals and as soon as that happens there will be a blog post about it.

I'm sort of feeling stuck again. I don't know what it is about making progress that makes you a little more lax in your eating but some how it happens to me over and over again. I'm still not indulging in sweets but I feel like I've allowed more and more other stuff into my diet over the last week or so. I'm all for having allowances in your diet but only every once in a while. So if I want to get to meet that major goal, I've got to continue to buckle down and do the hard things. Because let's face it, no matter where you are on your journey, living a healthy lifestyle is hard, life itself is hard. Choose your hard!

Peace, Love, and Healthy Living,

Jessica

#progress #accountability #nosweets

Things are going great.

 It feels so good to be making #progress and to be losing weight again.

I'm really enjoying using Twitter for #accountability. I feel less stress. I can be straight and to the point without worrying about an entire blog post and then worrying over how many people have viewed it, if they liked it or not, why no one is leaving comments, etc. Let's face it, blogging can add pressure more than being  the outlet I wanted it to be. I still enjoy writing and getting my story out there but Twitter is less stressful. Maybe no one is reading my posts over there but for some reason, I really don't care. I tweet about what I've eaten for the day or when I've completed my workout. I retweet helpful, healthy tips from other sources and I've been able to encourage other family members on their journeys as well. So all in all, it's working out for me. Do I wish you guys would get at Twitter account and "follow" me? Of course! But I'm not stressing.

So for those of you who've missed out on the tweets and are wondering about my #progress and the use of hashtags, here ya go...

First of all, the use of hashtags over on Twitter is for making points without using up too many words or characters. You only get 140 to make your point. Second, hashtags can be used to track what sort of things people are talking about or what's "trending" at the moment. If a lot of people use the same hashtags then that particular thing starts to "trend" and you can see other people's viewpoints on the subject. So why am I using them in my blog post? Well the words that you see that has the hashtag in front of it are the words that I am using when I tweet. These words are what set apart my healthy living #accountability from my everyday musings!

As you know from my last blog post a couple of weeks ago, I started doing The Couch to 5K running plan again, along with getting my eating under control, and giving up sweets or processed sugar until my daughter's birthday party in November. Today is day 15 of my 55 day #nosweets challenge! I am doing awesome! The combination of these three things has really done wonders for my body. I am FINALLY and I repeat FINALLY, out of the rut, plateau, whatever you want to call it, that I was in. Since last Monday, I've lost 5 pounds. I'm sure the total for the last two weeks is a bit more but I never weighed the first week. My scales weren't where they were supposed to be and I kept forgetting to find them and weigh. But I did weigh last Monday and know that I'm 5 pounds down since then! Hallelujah! That's #progress!

I'm so close to one of my weight loss goals that I'm really hoping that I meet it this week! I plan to work hard and continue to use Twitter for #accountability!

C25K has been a bit harder this time around. I'm running with my mom and her pace is faster than my natural pace but I try to stay up with her as best as I can. Maybe when it's said and done my 5K time will be much faster than the last time. That would be great!

#Nosweets has been harder than I thought. One thing about giving up sugar has been coming face to face with the reality of how much sugar I was consuming and some of it without really realizing it. Before starting this challenge, I would have said that I didn't eat much processed sugar and that it wasn't really a problem for me. But now, I know differently and I'm pretty sure that I can thank #nosweets for my weight loss this week. Along with the eating healthy and exercise, of course! Even if you aren't doing the #nosweets challenge with me, I want to offer you another challenge. Try and go 3 days with #nosweets and by this I mean no sugar in your coffee, fake or otherwise, no sodas, no candy, no cake, no cookies, no prepackaged products with added sugar, no peanut butter with added sugar, etc. Just try it. As you become more mindful of what you are putting into your mouth, you'll realize that some things that you consume absentmindedly or things you eat on a daily basis, have sugar or much more sugar than you thought. This challenge has been really eye opening for me!

We MUST be #accountable for what we put into our bodies! If we won't, no one else will!

If you want to be apart of my journey on a more daily basis, join me on Twitter, and follow me. I'm @jsfoster83

Otherwise, I'll meet you back over here on the blog soon!

Peace, Love, and Healthy Living,

Jessica

It's Me Again

It's been a while. Sometimes things don't go the way you expect them to. I decided to take a break from blogging to focus more on myself and my goals. I successfully completed one month of P90X and actually enjoyed it. However, I ended up gaining a pound by the end of that month and no matter what encouragement others offered me, I got discouraged. And then I did something that I often tell you NOT to do.

I gave up.

Now, I'm not saying that I was out there shoving terrible food down my throat at all times, knocking back diet soda's (which I have given up for good), and being an all around slob. But, my eating habits weren't as spot on and I overindulged too often and I stopped exercising all together. I went almost two months without any sort of exercise. I felt tired and sluggish again but most of all I felt guilty. I felt guilty that I have continued to rise up and fall down again over and over for the last 9 months. I felt guilty that I give advice that I don't seem to be taking myself anymore. And I really felt guilty that my hubby was away at training for the Army and working so hard and I was at home sitting on my butt. When I saw him a month ago he was so skinny and while it was amazing to see him, I couldn't help feel self conscious about my size. I've lost a lot of weight in the last year and a half but I still have a ways to go. Instead of letting that propel me forward, I slipped even farther down and allowed the emotional feelings to determine what I ate and what I did, which was junk and nothing.

A couple of days ago, it was like a light went off for me again. I saw my body for what it really was. I had grown comfortable in my size. I liked the way clothes fit me now and how I looked in them and I stopped seeing the work that I still had to do. I wasn't completely delusional. I knew that there was still work and if you asked me, I would tell you that I wanted to get to my goal weight, but I wasn't really too concerned about doing anything about it. I also realized that I only have about three months until I see my hubby again and I DO NOT want to look and feel like I did when I saw him last. So instead of doing what I normally do which is do a food cleanse, start a new exercise routine, and blog about it again, I decided to do what I did to begin with. I made some goals and decided to start the Couch to 5K running program over again. It's been months and months since I've run last and I probably couldn't run a mile without feeling like I was going to die. So this time, I enlisted my mom for support and accountability. We did week one, day one yesterday...in the rain, I might add. I really didn't have to tweak my diet too much, I was still eating healthy about 80% of the time, I was just allowing too many junk food snacks. I decided to give myself a challenge. I pray that I can stick with it. The challenge I set for myself was not to eat any "sweets" until Abigail's birthday party the first of November. In this I am mostly talking about processed stuff like candies and cookies and cakes.

Now, I know your wondering about the "blog about it again" part. If she isn't going to blog about then why is she blogging about it? Ha! I know, right? Well, when I do blog it will be sporadically. Maybe once a week, maybe less. I don't intend to blog every day or every other day. I'm actually going to try something new for accountability. I'm using Twitter right now. I've had a Twitter account for a long time. I take it by spells. I might tweet daily for a while and then not use Twitter again for months. But right now, Twitter is going to be my main outlet for accountability. Why? Well, with Twitter, you only get 140 characters to say what you've got to say. It forces me to be concise and to the point but still allows me to get my message out there. If you would like to join me in this quest for accountability and healthier living, come on over. If you already have a Twitter account you can follow me, I'm @jsfoster83. If you don't have a Twitter account, consider joining me and creating one. I'm using the hash tag #accountability for all my tweets related to my healthy lifestyle. If you decide Twitter isn't for you, don't fret. Like I said, I will be updating the blog and my Facebook page but only occasionally. I hope you'll join my on Twitter for some #accountability!

Peace, Love, and Healthy Living,

Jessica

My Old, New Self

I'm beginning to feel like my old self again. Well, my old, new self! What am I talking about?

I'm sure you've noticed the lack of posting over the last few months and the majority of the times that I did post, I had to be honest about my walls, my pitfalls, my sin. Life got complicated a few months ago and instead of leaning on the new, healthy principles that I've learned over the past year or so, I fell back into old habits and allowed my emotions and stress to dictate what I ate and whether or not I exercised.

I say "old, new self" because I feel like my healthy lifestyle isn't so new anymore yet it's more recent than my old, fat, disgusting lifestyle. Yep, I said fat and disgusting! No matter how you sugar coat it, that's what it was. I'm not Willy Wonka so it's time to stop sugar coating everything!

Normally, when I say things like that, I get several of the, "you were beautiful before," comments. And while I appreciate the sentiment and the sincerity behind the comments, I have to say that unhealthy is not beautiful, no matter what you look like. It's time to live up to our potentials and we can't do that if we die early because of complications due to obesity and unhealthy lifestyles and habits.

I recently posted on my blog's Facebook page that I was going to start being selfish and focusing more on me because no matter how much I want to help all of you, my healthy lifestyle and weight loss journey is about ME! I have to take care of me before I can really help take care of anyone else. And I've been doing that and I will continue to do that.

Over the last couple of weeks, I've been relearning some important facts about nutrition, diet, and weight loss. I've been rediscovering my love for healthy foods, cooking, and exercising. I am once again enjoying finding new recipes, coming up with new snacks, and being in control of my body again and...IT FEELS GOOD!

There are several factors that have had a part in my renewed passion for eating healthy and losing weight. One is that my husband is currently at BCT for the Army and I want to look really good when I see him again. I know that he is working hard and I want to be doing the same thing while he is gone. Second, my dad is getting ready to start teaching a health and nutrition class at church and if I'm going to be helping him with that, then I need to have my act together. Three, I recently completed a five day food cleanse that helped boost my metabolism, clear my body of toxic buildup, and reset my body to want the good stuff and not the bad stuff. Four, I'm one day away from completing my first week of P90X. It's hard but it's so rewarding when I finish a workout. It reminds me of how I felt when I completed the Couch to 5K plan last year. Every workout I complete makes me feel empowered and strong and even more determined. And lastly, I'm currently reading Bob Harper's book The Skinny Rules. Has it been earth shattering? Not really. Most of the rules are things that I had at one time or another already been doing. A couple were new but they were all things that I needed to hear again. Bob does an excellent job of backing his rules with scientific facts and examples. I'm only half way done but the latter part of the book is more or less, meal plans and recipes. If you are struggling to lose weight, I highly recommend the book!

It feels good to have my passion back. It feels good to be back to my old, new self.

Your new, healthier self is waiting but are you willing to do what it takes to find him or her?

Peace, Love, and Healthy Living,

Jessica

A Wall, Blue Bell Ice Cream, and Sin.

I've had every intention of posting recently but my mind and heart have been torn between another, "this is my life" post or an update on my weight loss journey. Even now, I'm not sure which I would benefit from more. This last week without Ryan has been incredibly hard but things are slowly getting better. My healthy lifestyle has been in the toilet, for lack of a better word, in the last month and I'm slowly getting that back on track. So which is it going to be?

Hmm....

I guess most of you found your way to my blog because of my healthy living journey so I guess I'll start there.

Last year I really hit a stride around November. The weight was just falling off and I had my act together. I was eating healthy, working out at the gym, going for daily walks. My running had fallen off by then but I was still doing the things I needed to be doing. Along came December and knocked me on my butt. I survived the holidays without wreaking havoc on my body and lifestyle but the scale wasn't budging. I got up though and set some new goals for a new year. I started off January headed in the right direction when out of nowhere, I ran smack into a brick wall. Over the next few months, I struggled with that wall, sometimes almost making it over before falling back down again. Climbing over it wasn't getting me anywhere so I thought I'd take a shot at going around it but by this time my heart wasn't in it. I was so frustrated and upset with myself. I was making poor choices on a daily basis. I continued to walk everyday but I had stopped going to the gym all together. I started and re-started my healthy lifestyle over and over again trying to get back to that committed girl who started losing all that weight last year. Eventually, I was no longer making any progress but continuously ramming my head against the wall. And most recently, I decided that the wall wasn't worth the effort anymore and just walked away from it.

That's really where this post picks up.

Right now, I could list for you at least 5 valid excuses that I used to walk away. I say valid because as you all know, life is messy and life is hard, and things just come up sometime that get in the way of the goals and plans that we have. The problem with these excuses is that they were excuses that I thought I had already dealt with and put to rest. But even the alcoholic knows, that no matter how long they've been sober, there is always that chance that they can slip up, that life can get in the way and that a drink seems like the only answer to the problems. But in the same token, an alcoholic doesn't have to go to the liquor store and buy it. He has a choice to drive a different direction, to choose not to drink. A food addict doesn't have that luxury. Food is  essential to sustain life. I have to eat to live or I'll die. So the temptation to over-indulge, to choose the wrong foods, to allow food to comfort and alleviate stress, is there. Not just once, but multiple times a day. So, I thought that I had conquered that stronghold in my life. I thought I was finally over letting my emotions and stress dictate what I ate and how much. But sin is sneaky like that. And I say sin because I truly believe that it is. This food addiction is a stronghold in my life. I often allow food to try and do the things in my life that I should be giving over to God and letting Him deal with. It's a sin of thinking that I know better than God does. It's a sin of trying to control my own life.

I kind of feel like I'm back at square one again. But maybe that's where God needs me. Maybe I need to be here again so that I can really deal with this sin in my life. Filling my body with junk does not glorify God. Treating my body like a trash can instead of a temple does not honor God. It is a poor witness. All of this is a realization that I've had to come to myself. I know people mean well. I know there are a lot of people out there who care about me. But honestly, the more people tell me when I'm doing things wrong or that I shouldn't be eating certain foods the more my sin nature wants to rebel. As a side note, if you find yourself being one of these people, good intentions or not, please realize that saying things like that can often hurt the person more than help them. Be there with listening ears. Set the example for them in the way you eat and the way you treat your body. If things are really out of control for the other person then a loving, gentle reproach is much better than an off hand comment or snide remark. And remember just because you do things a certain way doesn't make it the gospel on how things should be done. Every person is different, they have different limitations, and their bodies respond differently.

I am so thankful for those people in my life who do encourage me. I recently ran into my friend Clara at the mall. We are living in the same town now but haven't had a chance to get together. While still in the throws of my poor decision making, I was indulging in a fried chicken sandwich and french fries at Chic-Fil-A when I saw her. And instantly I felt guilty as I saw her eating her salad with barely any dressing. When I mentioned it, she encouraged me verbally and that alone was a big push in the right direction for me. Her actions alone was all the "reproach" I needed. If she had of verbally made an off hand comment about my poor choices, I probably would have reacted differently and instead of being nudged in the right direction, I would have probably walked further away from that wall.

Clara also encouraged me to get "real" on my blog. I shared with her my low point over the past month and I'm going to share it with you here today. I've always said that I don't have it figured out but I secretly thought I did. The following scenario should keep me humble for a while...

Because of the stress of moving and my husband getting ready to leave for Basic Combat Training with the Army, I let that be an excuse to eat poorly and not exercise. My choices got worse and worse as the weeks went on. Finally, on the day that we dropped him off at the recruiters office, I hit my low point. When we made it back to Graceville, I went to the local grocery store and bought a pint of Blue Bell ice cream and a bag of Doritos. I had already purchased a Dark Chocolate Snickers bar at a gas station on our way home. I also bought a Coke Zero even though I had most recently been cutting any products with Aspartame out of my diet all together. After my daughter went to bed, I polished off the ice cream, the Snickers, the cola, and half the bag of Doritos, all in the name of a tired, sad, stressed out heart. I wasn't completely finished. When I bought the ice cream, I bought 2 pints. The next day, I polished off two more Coke Zero's, the second pint of ice cream, more Doritos, and a bunch of other food. My week continued in pretty similar fashion although no day was as bad as that Monday night. On Saturday, I ran into Clara. I wish I could say that I was finished eating junk after that but I ate some crap Sunday night before bed.

Before you eat like that, you always think it will make you feel better even though you know differently. Years of living like this has taught me that but for some reason, I have a hard time reminding myself of that when I'm at that point. So I felt bad all week. I was emotional with my husband gone. I was frustrated with my lack of discipline and I was tired. The more I thought about what I had been doing to my body the more I began to see it as sin. You know the saying, "Sin will take you farther than you planned on going, keep you longer than you planned on staying, and cost you more than you planned on paying," or something like that. Well, instead of being right up against that wall, I'm pretty far away. I didn't plan on going that far or staying that long but the longer I've stayed away the harder it is to come back and to get back on track. And of course I payed more than I wanted, I've gained a few pounds back, I feel tired and sluggish, and I'm ashamed of my behavior. I'm not cured. I may never be. This may be a lifelong struggle and I'm going to have to be okay with that. On Monday, I made myself get up and go for a walk. I had a salad for lunch. I still made mistakes. But I recognized them and tried to learn from them and tried harder the next time. Today was 3 days in a row of getting up early and going for a walk. I still struggle with my food choices but most of that comes from being lazy. I have to get back into the routine of making a meal plan and doing the prep work that needs to be done. I also have to remember why I started this journey in the first place...my daughter and setting a good example for her. And most importantly, I have to deal with this sin. I have to confess it, pray about it, turn to God when the temptations arise, and dig into God's word for wisdom and guidance.

So there it is, in all of it's ugliness. This time, there will be no trying to climb over or go around the wall. It's time to tear it down once and for all. I'm not saying that there won't be another wall but at least I'll be better prepared to deal with it.

Peace, Love, and Healthy Living,

Jessica

Welcome to the Army Life

It's been a crazy, emotional, couple of days.

Monday was by far the hardest.

You see, on Monday, we dropped Ryan off at the recruiters office in Slidell and said goodbye for at least 9 weeks.

Back in January, he enlisted in the Army. You can read all about his decision and my thoughts about it here. We've had quite a few months to get used to the idea but the truth is, no matter how long you have to prepare for a separation like that, you're never really prepared.

We woke up early Monday morning and my parents picked the three of us up around 6:30 AM. We made the four hour drive to Slidell. Once we arrived we went by our friends house and picked up Ryan's car that we had left there when we moved. We then met more friends for lunch at Raising Cane's. After that, we went down the street to the recruiters office. They were waiting on another guy who was just beginning his process but was going to MEPS as well. We hung around the office with Ryan until the other guy showed up. I didn't want to be there to actually see him leave in the car with the recruiter so we stepped outside and said our goodbyes. That last "family hug" with Abigail is what did me in. I started crying and so did Abigail. Once in the car, I broke down a little, but I planned on driving us back since my dad was driving back Ryan's car and I knew I needed to pull it together. A few times in the first leg of our trip, I had to hold back tears and once we got back home and settled in our house, the tears came again. We had a dinner of "junk food" and went to bed. We both slept really good which was surprising. I think we were both worn out from the drive and the emotions of the day.

The first thing Abigail wanted when she woke up was her "kiss from daddy." On Sunday, Ryan worked on a project for Abigail that I had found on Pinterest. It's a jar filled with Hershey Kisses that says, "Kisses from Daddy!" Now, everyday she can still get a kiss from daddy even though he isn't here with us.

Luckily, we sent Ryan with his cell phone and charger even though the list said not to. I had read on a forum that you should send them anyway because some DS's let them use them when they get phone calls home and you'll get more time to talk with your spouse if they don't have to wait for a pay phone to open up. I was so glad we did because I received a couple of phone calls and texts on Monday as well as Tuesday.

When we woke up on Tuesday we got read and went over to my brother and sister-in-laws house to help paint Marlee's bedroom. Justin fixed us breakfast and we got started. We were able to completely paint the room and trim and get all of her furniture moved in and arranged. Marlee wanted Abigail to sleep in her new room with her so we stayed the night. We had a fun day and being so busy kept my mind off of Ryan being gone and not coming home anytime soon. A few times I started to get choked up when people would leave messages on my Facebook wall. You all don't realize how much all those messages and encouragements mean to me! I received the "scripted" phone call around midnight saying that he had arrived safely at Ft. Leonard Wood and would call when he could. I was glad to know he made it safely but I just wish I could have actually talked to him.

So, this morning. We got up and came back home. The house is a mess from the craziness of the few days before he left. I'm behind on laundry and I MUST get back on a good workout routine and back to eating clean. I still have at least 30 pounds left to lose and I want to look GOOD when I see Ryan for his BCT graduation sometime in August.

Thanks again for all the advice, encouragement, and prayers. Here is the last picture we took together before he left...

Peace, Love, and Healthy Living,

Jessica