Not Me Tuesday

Sorry for not posting "Not Me Monday" again! I think "Not Me Tuesday" will probably be permanent. So here goes:

I did NOT leave dirty dishes in the sink for five days straight. I did NOT drop one of the dirty bowls. It did NOT shatter everywhere. I do NOT think that I have a piece stuck in my foot.

My husband was NOT supposed to wash said dishes five days before. He was NOT supposed to wash them because I did NOT cook him steak and twice baked potatoes. I did NOT make a deal with him on Sunday that I would NOT wash the dishes if he bought us dinner and and rented a movie. I did NOT wait an addition two days. Nope, NOT me!

I am NOT still in the same pajamas that I was in when I woke up this morning. I would NEVER stay in my pajamas all day.

I did NOT try and sneak some of my child's Halloween candy so that I didn't have to share it with her. I did NOT try to quietly open the m&m's only to have her run into the kitchen and say, "mommy, what you doin?" I did NOT stifle a laugh and turn my back. I did NOT pour the contents of the m&m bag into my palm and I most certainly did NOT shove them into my mouth before turning back around. I also did NOT burst out laughing when she grinned at me and gave me a knowing look! She is NOT a smart two year old!